Get to Know Me Q&A - Youtube, Depression & Things in Life

 

My first and only Q&A vlog was made almost 2 years ago so I guess it's time for a second one. Have fun with a silent Q&A vlog and footage of our train trip from North Germany to Switzerland :D

“How do you keep yourself motivated all the time?”

By creating something I’m truly excited to create instead of doing it for the algorithm.

“How do you manage time as a mom and content creator?”

Good workflow, time management, prioritising my tasks and forever grateful that I have a great partner that we could share everything in life together. He never sees sharing household chores as helping me but an equal “job” of husband and wife.

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“How to be a good storyteller?”

Ansel Adams said once, “You don't make a photograph just with a camera. You bring to the act of photography all the pictures you have seen, the books you have read, the music you have heard, the people you have loved.”

Life is full of inspiration for us to draw from.

“Your life looks close to perfect to me. Why do you still have depression / anxiety disorder?”

This is one of the most common misconceptions about mental health. An anxiety disorder is a type of mental health condition and most of the time it has nothing to do with how good/bad one’s life is… And sometimes due to social stigma, we try to wear a ‘happy mask’. That we don’t look depressed at all.

“Does creating content affect your ability to enjoy the moment of joy?”

I upload one video every one or two weeks so what we see on my Youtube channel is a very small part of our life. There are so many precious moments that I wasn’t able (or didn’t find the need) to capture but that’s totally okay. I think being a photographer for a decade helps strengthening that mindset. That moment >>>>>> content.

“Would you want to tell yourself something when you started being self-employed?”

Actually no. The universe has a funny way to bring us to where we are now. A series of decisions and actions. For better or worse, I’m learning to be happy with who I am at the moment. Could I do better and tell my young self to change it?

Absolutely. But we don’t know if we’ve had change something from the past, even the slightest one, how much would other aspects of our life change?

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“Do you have a team or manager for your Youtube channel?”

No, it’s been only me and my husband from the beginning.

“Are you making a good income with your Youtube channel?”

Yes, with ads revenue, brand sponsorship, my online shop, clients’ work I’m able to make a living with my Youtube channel.

“Does Alexia likes playing along when you’re filming stuff?”

Actually it’s alway her insisting in being filmed. She loves doing every household chores that we do. I treat Alexia as if she’s an adult. So she participates in whatever activities she likes and I never force to do anything she doesn’t want to. I guess that’s how kids fare. They see the adults and mimic everything. If we want to teach our kids something then the adults have to show them that we ourselves are doing it on a daily basis.

“What do you not like about being an Youtuber?”

I think we’ve lost a big part of our privacy.
Or sometimes I received hate emails from racists and white supremacists telling me to go back where I’m from.

Or some toxic people who like to spread false rumors about me and my family, for instance we have rich parents or we have a big crew of editor, cameraman, writer…
But luckily, it’s just a very small numbers compared to the huge support that I receive from all of you. So thank you <3

“Your video has helped me a lot with my anxiety. But sometimes, I feel an empty void after watching your vlog because I know my life would never as good as yours.”

Please please don’t ever compare yourself to anyone. Because it’s a destructive path that we never want to go down. It may sound cliche but everyone is unique in their own way and the only person we should compare is ourselves of yesterday. I’m really sorry if my videos make you feel that way but I just want to clarify that it’s never my intention to show off, “Look how good my life is” to hurt anyone. I just want to create a safe haven in this mad mad world.

“What language do you speak at home?”

100% Vietnamese. Alexia learns and speaks German in the kindergarten.

“Tips for better parenting?”

Parenthood is no different than other relationship. We have to learn to love and respect our partner. Our kid is our “partner”. Love them the way they are. Show them the right way. Communicate, listen and try to understand their feeling. A happy childhood is the biggest legacy we can give our children.

“Where do you license music for your video?”

Epidemic Sound, Artlist, Musicbed… Check out this video’s description for 1-2 month free trial.

“Do you face racism in Germany?”

Sadly yes! But like anywhere in the world, there are kind and bad people out there. Over time I’ve learnt to be more vocal on this matter which was not a simple thing. We Asians are usually not confrontational.

“Will you stay in Germany forever?”

To be honest I don’t know and I’m not sure. Would like to be surprised by how my life would turn out though ;)

“Did you buy the current house?”

No, it’s a rental :D It’s the beauty of living in the countryside. I pay much less rent than my friends living in a much smaller apartment in the city. The current economic situation of the world is too bad to buy a house.

“Where did you learn photography/videography?”

My partner taught me everything I know ;)

“What is your top dream at the moment?”

Having my own farm in a remote, beautiful region with mountains in the background and retire there, grow our own food and to be 100% self-sustainable.

“Is it hard not having a car living in a rural place?”

Not in Germany, and not in my case. Because we both work from home. And public transportation in Germany is pretty good. Rural in Germany is hardly rural in reality due to strict build code. You can’t simply buy a patch of land and build a house in the middle of nowhere without an existing local community. Add in E-Bikes, Car rental and sharing and it’s easy.

“How’s the cost of living in Germany?”

Cheapest box of 10 eggs = 2€

500gr of Flour = 1€

10 Rolls of Toilet Paper = 4.5€

The southern cities of Munich and Stuttgart are the most expensive cities to live in Germany. Germany ranked 30th out of 197 countries by cost of living 

“Do you need a visa to stay in Germany?”

Yes, usually by getting work or study visa. Or getting married to a person with permanent residency.

“How is it that you always look so calm?”

No one can be always calm. Positivity and negativity always go hand in hand together and it’s a healthy, normal part of life. That’s what I’ve learnt - to come to terms with “the darker side” of me. Also when I’m feeling down, of course I’m not in the mood of picking up my camera and filming how sad I am :P

How do you deal with stress and anxiety?

Let's repeat after me:

My mental health problems are real and they are valid. I will not judge myself for the bad days when I can barely get out of bed. I will not make myself feel worse because someone else appears to be handling their mental health better than I am handling mine. Recovery is not a competition.

“How did you learn everything you showed in your videos?”

I’m kind of a self-taught person. Thanks to the generosity of people who share their knowledges on the Internet <3

“What do you do to stay socially engaged outside of home?”

I’m a deeply introverted person and would rather spend time with my family. I also have a very small group of friends that I can trust and be comfortable to hang around with.

“Do your aesthetic videos come mainly from your lenses, framing, editing, or color grading?”

For me, all the technical stuff is just a medium to express the way I see the world and ‘my aesthetic’ means my visual personal style. It is a cohesive collection of me and my interests. Being in touch with what I like and why and how I want to live my life. Start taking out things that I don’t feel like doing. And soon I’ll see consistent colors, patterns, angles, activities that stay true to myself while being visually engaged at the same time.

“What was the worst part of your life?”

When my depression was at its peak and I was battling with the overwhelming thought of ending my own life.

It’s a life long battle and although it will never go away completely, I’ve learnt to live with and understand my mental health better. So if you’re like me, please hang in there. Take care of yourself, seek help, find someone you can trust to talk to. Let’s help raising mental health awareness among lawmakers and general public.

“How to love ourselves and find peace when we are at our lowest and nobody is there?”

There’s those stretch marks, the blemishes, slightly crooked teeth, not so witty sense of humor, the weight gain (or loss) and let’s not forget about our  insecurities from childhood or trauma events from the past.

Saying “love ourselves’ is easy but in reality it’s much harder. Modern society doesn’t encourage us to do so in order to make money off of our insecurities, implies that this is a far larger task than anyone could have imagined. 

One that we often push to the side in order to avoid working too hard or simply because we desire to fit in.

But in order to be truly happy with one’s self and one’s life, inevitably the time will come to face our fears.

The true fix is not to live our life according to trends or how other people expect us to live, but to live a life based on what we want for our wellbeing and how we wish to feel about ourselves.

Ask ourselves the important questions:
What is no longer working in my life? Who brings me the most peace/Who brings me the most pain? Are my living arrangements conducive to my progress in life? What do I care about most/Why am I not enjoying this more? What are the things I know I should be doing, but haven’t? What is my purpose? In what ways can I put my happiness first?

Create a new environment, detach from people who interrupt our peace. Focus on changing our thoughts and everything else will fall into place.

“Are you worried about your daughter‘s education living in countryside as an expat family?”

We're not expats since we have permanent residency, and plan to live here long term (at least for now).

Alexia goes to the kindergarten, learns German.

Unlike us, she's very social girl and has lots of friends.

Education in Germany is mostly free as well.

So I'm not having any concerns regarding her education.

Although school is an important component of the society, and the purpose of school is to prepare children for life beyond that. But I also believe that kids can learn so much outside the classroom. I want to encourage her to develop critical thinking, problem-solving, decision-making skills, personal financial management, empathy towards the other, basic survival skills and knowledge about nature, growing food, appreciation for art….

We will try our best to give her all the tools she needs and she will have to decide herself what would she want to do with it.

“How do you resolve conflict as a couple?”

Conflict is a natural part of life. While it is not always damaging, it plays an inevitable role in every relationship.

All couples have disagreements. 

It is impossible to avoid them. It is how we handle them that will make or break our relationship.

I have a policy of never to avoid anything, no matter how difficult the conversation is. Express our problems with each other directly.

Revisiting the past and focus on good communication: clear, open and complete dialogue, maintain one argument at a time.

Purposefully listen to the other, without gaslighting or judgment.

"What are the some of the small moments in life that you enjoy?"

Walking aimlessly in the forest with the 2 people I love the most on earth.

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